Hearts held hostage

After the elation of getting to talk with Nico and Anwa for the first time has now worn off, today has been a much more difficult day.  I woke up early and couldn't go back to sleep.  At first, I was recounting all of the remarkable ways so far that it has seemed that it is just more than coincidence or misunderstanding that has laid the path of getting us to this place of grieving hope where we are today.  We have exhausted all options that we could think of over this holiday weekend.  Chuck has spoken with consulates, attorneys, foreign embassy personnel, and has drafted a letter to our congressman and made an appointment at immigration services.  We had our hopes up for a while that they would be able to legally escape to Rwanda on refuge papers and the adoption be completed in the US.  For the time being all answers at this point are that we just have to wait.  There is nothing we can do.  Sitting and waiting is the last thing we want to do after hearing yesterday from Trent that during the fighting a bomb had gone through the orphanage wall and kitchen yet never exploded.  (Thank you God for protecting them, YOU DID HEAR AND DID ANSWER OUR CRIES).  We can see in the near future the crumbling of this nation or much more bloodshed, rape, children becoming orphans and child soldiers as they lose families in the mass exodus, courts with officials who have likely fled, and if anyone happens to still be there, a confusion over who has authority upon return.

If we allow ourselves even for a short time to dwell on the circumstances, we begin to lose hope.  I can not afford to do that!  Neither can Chuck.  The pain of not being able to adopt these children would be one thing, but the pain of wondering their fate if left behind would be something entirely different.  We need a fresh word from God.  These past 6 days have seemingly been never ending days as we wait for Monday morning to roll around and see if our attorney in Congo has made any progress with his requests on our case.  Time is not on our side and if time has a thief, it is Congolese litigation.  As my mother-in-law said, "we don't need everybody to say "yes" we just need God to say "yes".  In which case, we know it will be.  God please keep our hearts and minds in a safe place regardless of the outcome.  And please bring those two precious children that will already forever be Hetzlers home immediately.  I believe, help my unbelief!